We like to catch them in a net. We like to pin them down firmly, hold them in place, brilliant and ghastly. We make decisions about our past ahead of time. An indeterminate future is to be voided, like peering over a cliff or a sharp descent. We like to avoid cliffs. We like to transform the future into the past. We negate freedom and transform it into a tiny pebble suspended in an infinite empty space. We chisel the sculptor’s block of the future into a human figure, then into a giant insect, then into an apple, then into the tiniest pebble, then into a message, a nice summary. We have memories from the future and call them big plans. We sketch out our hopes and dreams on printing paper, gather them into photo albums, and place them with a consciously haphasard air on our coffee tables. We like to place our feet on our coffee tables, one resting on the other, fold our arms, scratch our chins, and think about what we are going to do.

Storming the gates of urbandictionary.com

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Submission:

 

post-sequitur

 

While a non sequitur is a comment which does not logically follow the preceding comment, and a pre-sequitur is a comment relating to something mentioned much earlier in a conversation, a post-sequitur follows something yet to be said. 

 

Compared with non sequiturs and pre-sequiturs, genuine post-sequiturs are rare, as most Americans find them immoral. 

 

Example: 

 

Jack: Hey there, sweet thang.

Jan: Sure, I’d love to.

Jack: Would you like to go out for a drink? Wait, what?

Jan: Hells yeah it was!

Jack: Was that some kind of post-sequitur?

Jan: Fine, have it your way. Toodle-oo!

Jack: Away with thee or I shall do mur-rer-der-r-r! 

 

Source: DanielR, Durham, NC

Problem is, I’m up against some stiff competition.